French Kids Don’t Throw Food by Pamela Druckerman

Title:

 French Kids Don’t Throw Food

Author:

Pamela Druckerman

How do the French manage to raise well-behaved children, and have a life?

This is the secret Pamela Druckerman will reveal in her book French Kids Don’t Throw Food.

A New Yorker married to an English husband, and raising kids in Paris, Druckerman discovered that French mothers do things differently and often better.

When Druckerman was in Paris, both she and her husband went through hell when dining in the restaurant with their little baby. All they wished was to quickly finish their meal and leave. What caught their attention was that French parents with little kids do not go through the same situation.

Here were what they seen in France.

At the restaurant:

“The French children all around us don’t look cowed. They’re cheerful, chatty and curious. Their parents are affectionate and attentive. There just seems to be an invisible, civilizing force at their tables – and, I’m starting to suspect, in their lives – that’s absent from ours.”

At the playground:

“I’ve never seen a child (except my own) throw a temper tantrum.”

At home:

“Why don’t my French friends need to end a phone call hurriedly because their kids are demanding something? Why haven’t their living rooms been taken over by teepes and toy kitchens, the way ours has?”

“Why so many French babies start sleeping through the night at two or three months old?”

“Why French kids don’t require constant attention from adults, and that they seem capable of hearing the word ‘no’ without collapsing?”

Druckerman found that French parents are very concerned about their children but not to the point of panicking over their children’s well-being. This makes them better at establishing boundaries and at the same time giving their kids some autonomy.

In her book, Druckerman reveals more stories on what she has discovered in parenting à la francaise.

Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting by Dr. Laura Markham

Title:

 Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting

Author:

Dr. Laura Markham

Does parents’ emotion affect kid’s emotional development?

How does stopping yelling and starting connecting help in nurturing happy kids?

There is an old saying that goes – “Raising children is the toughest work there is”.

In Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting, Dr. Laura Markham reveals an important message to all parents – “fostering emotional connection with your child creates real and lasting change. When you have that vital connection, you don’t need to threaten, nag, plead, bribe or even punish”.

With the practical step-by-step examples and phrasing that come in handy when raising children age 0 through age 9, Dr. Laura Markham reveals on “how to replenish our spirits so we can give our kids the best of ourselves, not what’s left of ourselves”.

This book approaches parenting from THREE big ideas, which are (1) Regulating Yourself, (2) Fostering Connection, and (3) Coaching, Not Controlling.

Chapter	Title	Sub-titles
Introduction	Secrets of Peaceful Parents	·         PART ONE: Regulating Yourself
1	Peaceful Parents Raise Happy Kids	·         Your No. 1 Responsibility as a Parent ·         Breaking the Cycle: Healing Your Own Wounds ·         How to Manage Your Anger ·         How to Stop Yelling at Your Child ·         When Your Child Melts Down: How to Keep Your Cool ·         You Can Nurture Yourself While Raising Your Child ·         Ten Rules to Raise Terrific Kids ·         PART TWO: Fostering Connection
2	The Essential Ingredient for Peaceful Parents, Happy Kids	·         Why Connection Is the Secret to Happy Parenting ·         Connection as Your Child Grows -       Babies (0-13 months): Wiring The Brain -       Toddlers (13-36 months): Building Secure Attachment -       Preschoolers (3-5 years): Developing Independence -       Elementary Schoolers (6-9 years): Foundation for the Teen Years ·         Connection Basics -       How to Connect More Deeply With Your Child -       How Do You Know When Your Relationship With Your Child Needs Work? -       Connecting With A Difficult Child ·         Action Guides ·         PART THREE: Coaching, Not Controlling
3	Raising a Child Who Can Manage Himself: Emotion Coaching	·         Why Emotion-Coach? ·         Emotional Intelligence as Your Child Grows -       Babies (0-13 months): A Bedrock of Trust -       Toddlers (13-36 months): Unconditional Love -       Preschoolers (3-5 years): Empathy -       Elementary Schoolers (6-9 years): Emotional Self-Awareness ·         Emotion Coaching Basics -       How Children Develop Emotional Intelligence -       Empathy, The Foundation of EQ -       Your Child’s Emotional Backpack -       Understanding Anger -       Meeting Your Child’s Deepest Needs -       EQ Coaching With A Difficult Child ·         Action Guides -       7 Steps to Nurture Emotional Intelligence in Your Child -       Emotion-Coaching Your Child Through A Meltdown -       When Your Child Acts Out But Can’t Cry: Building Safety -       Playing With Your Child: Games for Emotional Intelligence -       Additional Resources: Scripts For Sibling Conflicts
4	Raising a Child Who Wants to Behave	·         The Dirty Little Secret About Discipline and Punishment ·         Guidance as Your Child Grows -       Babies (0-13 months): Empathic Redirection -       Toddlers (13-36 months): Sidestepping Power Struggles -       Preschoolers (3-5 years): Learning Self-Management -       Elementary Schoolers (6-9 years): Developing Positive Habits ·         Setting Limits with Empathy: The Basics -       The Sweet Spot Between Strict and Permissive -       Should You Spank Your Child? -       Is Yelling The New Spanking? -       Transform Your Time-Outs to Time-Ins -       The Truth About Consequences -       Does Positive Parenting Work With A Difficult Child? ·         Action Guides -       How to Set Empathic Limits -       How to Help Kids Who Test The Limits -       Wean Yourself Off Consequences: 12 Terrific Alternatives -       How to Intervene In The Heat of the Moment -       Empowering Kids to Make Amends With The Three Rs: Reflection, Repair, and Responsibility -       Preventive Maintenance -       What If Your Child Crosses The Line? -       Additional Resources: Scripts
5	Raising a Child Who Achieves with Joy and Self-Esteem	·         What is Mastery Coaching? ·         Building Mastery as Your Child Grows -       Babies (0-13 months): The Budding Scientist -       Toddlers (13-36 months): Do It Myself: Developing Response-Ability -       Preschoolers (3-5 years): Self-MASTERY Through Problem Solving -       Elementary Schoolers (6-9 years): EXPLORING Passions ·         Mastery Basics -       Encouraging Mastery -       How Kids Develop Resilience -       Giving Constructive Feedback -       How to Avoid Helicopter Parenting -       What If You Have a Child Who Doesn’t Develop Mastery Naturally? ·         Action Guides -       Create a No-Blame Household -       Developing Responsibility -       Developing Good Judgment -       Homework Without Tears -       Trust Your Child – and Mother Nature
	Afterword	·         When to Seek Professional Help ·         The Future is in Your Hands

Everyone can be a more peaceful parent.

Providing a loving, compassionate, scream-free, judgment-free household has not just been a gift to my children, but a gift I have given to myself. I have grown by leaps and bounds not just as a parent, but as a person as well. I am so grateful for Dr. Laura Markham, who has been a shining light in my life.

-       Jennifer, mother of four kids, ages 15, 12, 9, and 6.

One generation full of deeply loving parents would change the brain of the next generation, and with that, the world.

-       Charles Raison

Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist Michael Winterhoff Talks on Education Concept in Germany

It is quite alarming that many young people in Germany do not fulfil the pre-requisites for vocational training. According to child and adolescent psychiatrist, Michael Winterhoff, many of the young people in Germany today not only lack the basic competences in German and maths, but also lacking in social competences such as work ethic, punctuality and structure.

These young people do not share the same passion in the workplace as they do for computer games. Winterhoff believes that it all goes back to early childhood education, to between ages three to six when our abilities start to evolve.

As children are seen, led and guided as children for at least 15 years, their maturity develops at a slower pace. Adults tend to explain and demonstrate a skill to their children instead of letting them to explore and try it out themselves.

In school, teachers are receding into the background, assuming the role of mentor or coach. Students in the primary school are left to teach themselves how to read, write and do maths, with the senior levels teaching the junior levels.

Winterhoff sees this as detrimental towards children’s psychology as they often attend school just to gain their mothers’ approval and do things they do not like just for their teachers’ sake.

Often, many parents hold on to the motto “even if nobody out there loves me, my child at least should do so” when they themselves faced with growing loss of orientation and recognition. This thinking has put a negative impact on the growing children as these children feel that adults are bigger and stronger than they are.

Given the general uncertainty and anxiety about the society’s future, parents start to merge with their children’s minds and develop false reactions that hinder emotional development. Hence, according to Winterhoff, they end up in a cycle of egocentric, inability to cope with life, lacking in independence and unemployability. In fact, this is a global phenomenon seen in all wealthy countries.

South Korean Teachers: What Can We Learn from Them?

The education approach in South Korea is very different from the one in Finland. While Finland gives their students a lot of freedom in learning, South Korea emphasizes on intense schooling.

Let’s see the approaches South Korean teachers take in teaching and learning.

Get parents involved	Teachers and parents in South Korea maintain a positive relationship. Teachers often update their students’ parents on their kids’ performance and what they are learning in order to keep the parents engaged.
Use technology	Technology, such as computers, the internet, LCD screens and smart boards, is compulsory in all classrooms. Besides aiding in the teaching process, technology enables the sharing of more knowledge and tailoring the lessons to the students’ learning style. In fact, technology helps students to learn faster and develop deeper foundation skills.
Do their best every day	South Korean teachers go extra mile and perform better than expected. They are so committed to do their best every moment.
Inspire their students to do their best	With committed teachers, students will feel inspired and highly motivated to give their best too.
Always be willing to learn	South Korean teachers often go for courses on education and teaching. They are willing to impose new teaching techniques and try their best to keep their teaching fresh and interesting.